Tonight, while I was rinsing a roll of negatives, I found a beautiful old book in a yet-unpacked-from-2005 basement box. It was a decades-old Edgar Allan Poe collection, the binding a faded red, the pages yellowed with age. Oh… the words. I had forgotten! I devoured them, and they felt like rich dark chocolate to my eyes; and I forgot completely about the water wasting away down my darkroom sink. This passage is from the short story Eleonora:
Men have called me mad; but the question is not yet settled, whether madness is or is not the loftiest intelligence — whether much that is glorious- whether all that is profound — does not spring from disease of thought — from moods of mind exalted at the expense of the general intellect. They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. In their gray visions they obtain glimpses of eternity, and thrill, in awakening, to find that they have been upon the verge of the great secret. . . .
We will say, then, that I am mad.
And in my own rapturous madness, I grabbed a pen, and I drew on the pages! I boxed in a particularly beautiful line, then drew a woman’s face around it, her hair flowing across the words of a haunting tale. I did stop to pause for a moment, thinking, this isn’t a problem is it? But a picture of a large, new book I had purchased as a gift for Hercules, (the-complete-works-of-poe-or-something?) flashed in my mind. Right, then. All good. draw, draw, doodle, doodle, read, read, yay.
An hour later, in the living room, Hercules is standing with an old, red book in his hands. His eyes are wide, and he appears dumbstruck.
Crap.
“. . .in a 1927 edition of Poe?” I think he might cry.
Suddenly, I understand Mowgli, when, in such painfully obvious circumstances, he replies, “I didn’t mean to!”
- Mowgli, in a compulsive moment of catalog-doodle weakness. I totally get it.
will you say, then, that hercules is mad? oh, teeners. you make me laugh.
…and that is a beautiful pic of mowgli… LOVE the look on his face!
Could this be the first time I am torn between Herc’s and your response? Oh, the horror! A 1927 edition? Really?
Creative juices be loosed, woman!
But … a 1927 edition?
Ah, this could be your salvation. Tell him that *I* said how horrified I am with your behavior and he’s sure to say, “oh, she’s dumb, it’s not that big of a deal”. ‘
You’re welcome.
LOL, Amy.
Temporary insanity Terri, that’s all, although next time maybe you’ll be moved and inspired by the J Crew catalog. I’m sorry for Herc, but I’m still kind of giggling.
2005… is that when you moved? My mind is mush; I can’t remember.
Could you show him the article about Jung’s Red Book and tell him the Poe edition will now be worth a fortune to your heirs?
oh terri. ohhhh terri. I physically jerked and cringed when I read it. I was hoping you were going to say- just kidding! of course I didn’t!
oh.
ohhhhhh! *gasp* – choke- choke-
ok lets forget about that-
the other thing I have to say is- I can’t EVER ever ever bring myself to yell at my kids for coloring on the walls…or furniture really..because seriously. how can I? they see me do it all the time, so really, it’s only fair. Coloring on OTHER people’s walls however……(still sorry Julie! )
i am torn. on the one hand, wonderful bit of inspiration in the moment, et al. on the other, …well, it’s been said before, and i am such a book lover…1927? (squeaky little barely perceptible voice) then again i let c stuff a 1950ish copy of ‘the age of reason’ into her potty…
DOH!
Yep, I had to cringe, too. But honestly, that’s how moved you were by Poe’s words. And you know what else? It’s all just material. You captured a moment and created a memory that (hopefully) your family will be laughing at for a loooooong time.